Ode to White Uniforms

You gotta love the white uniform wearers. These are, perhaps, the people with the messiest jobs, yet still choose to don the color which will ultimately highlight the stains of their work, should they have "an accident." Painters...is the white uniform a measure for the customer to see how often you get the paint in the right spot (that big wall in front of you) or a neutral background to test your colors? Nurses...we all know that hospitals wish to convey the sanitary, the germ-free, and nothing reinforces those white, hospital walls like a white nurse's uniform. That is, with the exception of that urine stain from emptying the bed pan or that vomit chunk. This may be why we're starting to see more of those patterned uniforms. Chefs (cheves?)...you toiler of my dinner, you! I feel much better being able to see the hard work you put into my manicotti, not to mention the hand-shaped sauce smear across your belly, which reminds me you were just using your bare hands on my recently ingested food! And, of course the servers...you're in that same category of the chef...diligently following health code regulations by following the three second rule when a portion of my salad hits the ground and using the power of suggestion with your wine stains so that I might buy a bottle and you can eek a little extra tip out of me. Ah me! Who knows? You may simply be people who enjoy a good laundry challenge every now and then.